The Run to Home Base: Defy Limitations and Escape Excuse-Making for Charity
It was around Mile 2 that I started to feel it.
I didn’t get a good warm up in before we started. My shoes weren’t tied tight enough. As my feet slipped around and burned, I could feel blisters coming.
Worse yet, my running form was poor: my shoulders were hunched, my back was tight, I wasn’t leaning enough and my breathing was nonrhythmic, too deep, almost desperate.
In other words, the “chi running” technique that I had studied and practiced for months and months before this big day — the Run to Home Base 9K Road Race to benefit treatment of wounded military veterans with traumatic brain injuries, post-traumatic stress and depression — was completely escaping me.
Yup, right around Mile 2 I started to feel everything in my body (and in my mind) starting to go wrong.
Excuses were sneaking in. Doubt surged forth and I started to wonder if I’d have to stop running, if even for a moment, in spite of my goal to not stop pushing onward until I hit the finish line.
But around Mile 2 I started to feel something… else.
At the second mile marker, a young man, probably 30-some years of age, who appeared to be a paraplegic from the waist down, was fighting with all of his might to accelerate his hand-operated, three-wheeled racing style wheelchair along the course. …What was I complaining about?
Excuse-making is one of the most debilitating and yet over-active thinking processes we encounter in our daily lives. The nature of excuse-making is that after years and years of existing unchecked, it becomes totally habituated: completely second-nature, unconscious, and so easy to fall into.
When you neglect to notice it, let alone question and challenge your mind’s excuse-making habits, the cycle suddenly becomes very difficult to escape.
No More Excuses
In spite of whatever pain or discomfort I was feeling, I took but a few seconds to cheer on the young man with positive words of encouragement. And in that moment, I felt empowered, myself. Not only because I realized I had nothing to complain about. Not only because I was inspired by his strength, determination, sheer will and true guts. I suddenly felt encouraged by encouraging him to push forward.
My runner’s mindset shifted from that point forward, for the next 3.6 miles. I escaped my own worried, insecure, excuse-riddled thinking as I toughed out that short run by explicitly placing attention on encouraging other runners in the race.
- I cheered on one older runner, probably 70 years young, as he defied his physical limitations and pushed forward for a great cause.
- I patted one big dude on the shoulder as he lugged a full, military-issued ruck-sack at a snail’s pace — a veteran’s way of showing of true solidarity and strength with those still serving overseas.
- There was one limping woman who hobbled forward without complaint.
- And another young man who, while running, was pushing another disabled participant in his wheelchair. And so on, and so on.
Clearly, there was no shortage of inspiration in this crowd of runners!
“You Get What You Give”
With each moment that I took to cheer on or encourage another person along their path, I felt doubly motivated to push forward, myself.
This road race was not only a physical challenge, but a mental one that afforded me the opportunity to practice what I often preach: that giving liberally actually and literally provides you with immediate and long-lasting reward. My experience on Sunday helped to reaffirm the incredible life lesson about “giving” and “receiving.” You truly do “get” what you give. I don’t know how or why this works. I just know that it’s the truth.
And a relatively simple shift in mindset from “zero sum” to “million sum” — from “I don’t know if I can do this” to “I know that each of us can and will accomplish this” — was enough to help propel me to the finish line in a cool 49 minutes flat, at a modest pace of 8 minutes and 46 seconds per mile (beating out my goal of 50 minutes and 40 seconds!).
All together, we 2000 runners helped raise $2.6 million for wounded military veterans and their families. With your help, my own fundraising efforts contributed $1,330 to this important cause. Thank you.
Take It From Me
No, I didn’t set the world alight with fiery quick feet as the Greek god, Hermes. I didn’t complete the Boston Marathon, conquer a 100k or crush the competition in an Iron Man triathlon. But, really and quite truly, you don’t need to shake the Earth to change it… or even to change your own world.
You can stoke the flames of pure positivity — those which begin in time to sustain themselves without great effort or wasted energy — in your heart, your soul, and your mind by pushing your self-imposed, self-conceived limitations.
You can, at any time of your choosing, decisively conquer your long-standing fears and begin to throw out all of the habituated excuses that have long held you back. As I limp around my apartment in Boston, that’s what I really want you to take to heart today.
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PS: I’ll be attending BlogWorld Expo in New York this week. If you’re in town and would like to meet up in person, give me a holler!






13 COMMENTS... READ 'EM BELOW AND SHARE A THOUGHT
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Matt Langdon
It’s good to see someone who is blogging about life, actually do something to back up their writing. Great work Dave.
May 23 2011 / 08:05 pm
Dave Ursillo
Thank you Matt my friend, I hope to make this sort of event a frequent occurrence that will help raise awareness of great causes while contributing important financial support (and, of course, putting my money where my mouth is!) :)
May 24 2011 / 01:05 pm
Diana
Congratulations. It didn’t matter what your time was at all – you decided to commit to a great cause and you did it and you finished it. Not many can say that.
I hold the military close to my heart, as my boyfriend was in the Marine Corps. He is out now, but it is still very much a part of his life, my life, and our friends’ lives.
I hope to be doing more for the military in the years to come – especially including the families.
Great work!
May 24 2011 / 10:05 am
Dave Ursillo
Thank you Diana, and thank your boyfriend for me personally and on behalf of us all here. You're right, families also serve and sacrifice so much when their loved ones are away.
Thankfully this cause also supports the families of military veterans, in addition to the veterans themselves. Very grateful and happy to help in any small way that I can, as always-- there was an inspiring bunch in that crowd!
Dave
May 24 2011 / 02:05 pm
Brandon
Excellent, Dave. I’ve had similar experiences lately in other situations, and I believe it comes back to intention. When our intention is to lift others up, we in turn lift ourselves up.
Thanks for putting this wisdom out there and being a beacon of hope and inspiration for others to follow. You’re a class act, my friend.
May 24 2011 / 11:05 pm
Dave Ursillo
Right on Brandon. Something that's been nagging my thoughts (in a good way) in the last few days has been the usual "either/or" dichotomy of thought that I think is naturally pervasive in our culture... the one of "either us OR them," "me OR you," or "black OR white," "up OR down."
Shifting this paradigm and beginning to dismiss the "tyranny of the OR," as it's called in business, we can each begin to train our minds to think in an inclusive "genius of the AND" (which says, seeming opposites or opposing ideals can actually work together in harmony, like yin and yang) kind of way.
SO, applying this idea to my own story here, I tried to escape my own self-doubt and insecurity in my head by telling myself it wasn't a matter of me succeeding OR encouraging others to do well, but that I could push through and succeed AND help others do the same.
The cool part is that, for me, encouraging others helped me to dig deep and keep going.
May 27 2011 / 12:05 pm
Stuart
Dave, I’m impressed with you man. You learned a valuable life lesson out there, one which we could all benefit from:
“Only you can make it happen”
No-one else will take over when you start making excuses. No-one else will help you up the mountain when you give in and go home. It’s all down to you to make it to the top and achieve whatever it is you want to achieve.
I’ve got your contribution for my Value 101 series over at my place Dave, as Part 8. Be good to see you there if you wanna come over? :-)
May 27 2011 / 08:05 am
Dave Ursillo
Hey Stuart! I'd amend that thought slightly by adding, "Only you can start to make it happen."
No man is an island, as the saying goes. There is an interesting, near contradiction to the idea of the individual in an interconnected, overlapping world -- especially among human beings who are such uniquely social creatures. It's not one or the other that's right or wrong, is a special blend of both.
Yes, achieving a higher level of purposeful living truly begins with you because it requires your explicit choice, elements of bravery and determination, patience and risk. Further, such a pursuit depends on you so you do not allow excuse-making to derail you.
HOWEVER... such pursuits also require you to not forget that you are not endeavoring for your own sake only-- that would be selfish. When we follow our hearts and make our dreams realities, nurture purer senses of personal leadership and happiness within us, we truly do GIVE to others in so many ways.
And let's not forget how a social network of friends, family, neighbors, contacts, and so on really can help us achieve our personal goals while we likewise can help others achieve theirs.
The individual in a social world, it's not one or the other, it's both!
D
May 27 2011 / 01:05 pm
J.D. Meier
> you don’t need to shake the Earth to change it
So true.
And it’s great how we can change the world right under our own feet.
May 31 2011 / 01:05 am
Dave Ursillo
Right on, JD! One step at a time (running pun!) :)
May 31 2011 / 11:05 am
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