DaveUrsillo.com

  • About+Contact
  • Is This You?
  • Me+The Microphone
  • My Book, Lead Without Followers
  • Free Chapter
  • Press+Media
  • Blog Archives
  • Subscribe Today
  • You are a Stone; Life is Your Mason

    By Dave Ursillo on Jun 7, 2010
    • Tweet
    You are a Stone; Life is Your Mason

    “I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free.” ~Michelangelo Buonarroti

    We’ve all asked ourselves, “Why do bad things happen to good people?”

    And truly, why do they? Why should they?

    Why do terrible, tragic, and life-altering events have to happen to us in our lives, and why do they happen to good people who are always trying their best to do the right thing? Why the injustice?

    Although every human being is individually unique and the circumstances of how we are brought into this world when we are born vary quite greatly, we all come into life as equals as spiritual beings. In other words, we are each born as the spiritual equivalent to a fresh block of stone. Life is our mason; it shapes a statue of who and what we become, underneath.

    The Certainty of Choice

    One way to begin to understand and ultimately come to grip with the fact that bad things occur to good people is to understand the nature of life: spanning both the consequences of the decisions we make and forces forever outside of our control, like a mason that shapes and helps influence who we become.

    This is not to say that outside forces exclusively influence who we become. I think it is clear that in our lives, we each possess the ability to make choices. In free countries and societies, we have more freedom to make choices and influence the direction of our lives. In closed societies and oppressed nations, men and women possess less free choice than we in free lands, but as human beings, we all retain the ability to think, make decisions and make choices.

    So long as choice is involved (and with human beings there is always Choice), we have the ability to shape our lives and who we become on the inside, to varying degrees. We make choices when we decide between which car to buy or which college to attend, and our lives are directly impacted and forever changed by those decisions. When something occurs to us outside of our control — we get into a fender bender, we contract an illness, we get laid off from work — although the event was not directly chosen by us, we can still choose how to react to the event:

    • In a car accident, we could assault the other driver in a fit of road rage, or remain calm.
    • We can choose to fight the illness we have contracted and change our lifestyle to better combat it, or choose to not do so.
    • If we are laid off, we can lose all hope and feel like a victim, or choose to take advantage of the new opportunity to find a better job that will make us happier and more fulfilled.

    The Statue Beneath the Stone

    During the duration of our lives, events take place — some outside of our control, some directly resulting from the decisions we make — that cause life to makes swings and takes chips out of us, which shape us into who we ultimately become, like a statue lying deep beneath the stone. Between what we choose and what we do not choose, our lives act like masons and shape the solid block of stone into a statue underneath: a completely unique, special individual who offers the world something that no one else can.

    Sometimes, life clubs off a large shard as with the loss of a loved one, battling a severe illness or by way of a terrible trauma. Other times, our block of stone receives just a nick, a slight cut or chip, like from a minor learning experience in our youth or being exposed to others’ terrible living conditions in developing countries on the news.

    So when we are making decisions every day, as well as encountering events that occur outside of our control, begin to pay close attention to how you react and how your decisions might influence life to take either a small chip or large chunk off of your individual block of stone. If a small incident occurs unto you, let it be but a small chip off of your block, and choose to not let it become a large crack that forever changes your life and who you become. Between the decisions we make, the events that occur in life and how we choose to react to them, life shapes who we ultimately become — the statue beneath the stone.

    [fblike]

    • Tags:
    • block
    • choice
    • chosen
    • control
    • coping
    • decisions
    • destiny
    • fate
    • human behavior
    • life
    • people
    • psychology
    • psychotherapy
    • react
    • spiritual
    • things
    • why
      Share:
    • Tweet

    About the Author

    Writer, Author of Lead Without Followers + Alternative Leadership Speaker (Download my digital speaker's kit!) Tao, Yoga + Buddhism enthusiast. Also, a pretend rockstar + aspiring Jedi.

    About Lead Without Followers

    Lead Without Followers

    Lead Without Followers radically redefines what it means to be a leader by empowering you to embody leadership on a personal, profound level. Download a free chapter!

    Dig the Alternative Leadership vibe? Become an Insider! When you subscribe to receive free updates from the blog, you'll also get instant access to:

    • My viral leadership manifesto, The Speech I Never Gave, downloaded 2,500+ times
    • The "6 Ways to Summon the Power" email series to jumpstart your journey
    • Awesome offers and promotions not announced on the blog
    • Plus, you'll become 100% tuned-in to my cutting-edge alternative leadership mission

    Share Your Thoughts, Start a Conversation!

    Sign in or Post as Guest
    Livefyre logo
    • Comment help
    • Get Livefyre
    Post comment as
    twitter logo facebook logo
    Sort: Newest | Oldest
    Sharyce Arciaga

    Very nice site. I have bookmarked your site and will return often!

    share
    • spam
    • offensive
    • disagree
    • off topic
    Like
    Dave Ursillo

    Jeff,

    This is a great example of something beyond our control influencing the circumstances of our lives. The state of the economy, for example, has impacted millions. But although we cannot really change how the economy has impacted us, what we can do is make the right decisions based upon what unfolds.

    Whether or not the job is indeed less secure in reality, as is your perception; or that your perception of the job's security is influencing an actual career vulnerability.. it's kind of a "chicken and the egg" toss up. The great news is that you are recognizing that "something" deep within you that is calling your conscience, your gut, your heart, to make an important decision. So long as you are true to yourself and motivated by these "right" influences, I think you will make the correct decision for yourself!

    Dave

    share
    • spam
    • offensive
    • disagree
    • off topic
    Like
    Jeffrey Beesler

    I am finding right now that the forces beyond my control are making me think twice about staying in the same place work-wise. Suddenly my current job feels less secure than it did a few months ago. This might have been brought on by my constant choosing to fear losing my job, and the universe just worked to feed that fear. Now I'm thinking about taking on a job where integrity is actually applicable to the position. I'm still grappling with this choice but I'm not about to let someone else make the decision for me.

    Thank you for another wonderful post! Proud to be a renegade!

    share
    • spam
    • offensive
    • disagree
    • off topic
    Like
    • My Book, Lead Without Followers

      My Book, Lead Without Followers
    • Subscribe for Updates: Get Instant Access!

      Free insight? Awesome inspiration? All right to your inbox? Subscribe to receive the Speech I Never Gave manifesto, downloaded over 2,500 times!

    • Welcome to DaveUrsillo.com

      Meet Dave Ursillo

      I'm Dave Ursillo, a writer, alternative leadership author and speaker.

      My mission is to teach you how to "Lead Without Followers" in any walk of life by nurturing a quiet, profound sense of personal leadership. Learn More »

      • RSS via e-mail
    • Search

    • Get Awakened With These by Dave

      • Power from Within: A Manifesto by Dave Ursillo
      • 18in18: lessons from the tao te ching by dave ursillo
    • Most Popular

      • How to Lead Without Followers: the World Domination Summit Talk I Never Gave
      • 25 Things I've Never Told You (Or, a Writer Upping the Ante)
      • What Does Love Mean to You?
      • 15 Mind-Blowing Books That I Can't Stop Recommending
      • 11 Reasons Why I Gave Up $70,000 to Write This Blog
      • Three Years Later, My Debut Book 'Lead Without Followers' is Finally Here
      • Depression + Me
      • 7 Brilliant Ways to 'Live in Harmony With Everything' in 2011
      • but who inspires the inspirers? recent wisdom from 12 friends around the world
      • My 2-Year "I Quit" Anniversary and Why, Eventually, You'll Leave Me
    • As Seen On...

      As Seen On...

Copyright © 2011 Dave Ursillo. Share excerpts freely under The Creative Commons.

Theme created by Obox